On my way out of the door of church I couldn't believe how free I felt. It was if a 50 pound weight had been lifted off of me. God had just healed some very deep scars in my heart. I felt them go, I was joyous! I felt the unworthiness I had been carrying evaporate. It was unbelievable, but yet it had happened!
As I walked away I felt a coldness come in me, I heard a voice in my head say, "I told you so! You went there to make everyone look at you! See, you are self absorbed! You just make it all about you!"
I can't tell you how many times I had heard that voice in my head. I have been tortured by that voice for almost 20 years! Oh, but God had armed me that day! Before I left I was warned that Satan would try to come at me and take all the freedom I had just been given! I just had no idea how right that warning was. My eyes had been opened to the war that was being fought in my head. Now I could see the flaming arrows that were being shot my way, I could fight them off. They bounced off that mighty shield that had been placed in my hands! I couldn't help but to laugh! "Oh, you're not stealing this from me, Satan! You're not convincing me to wrap those chains back around myself!"
"So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed."
"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."
So much has been stolen from me! So much has been destroyed! No more!
"You need to hide, if they see your sin they will hate you, you will be alone!"
"You need to hide that, it is so bad, so dirty that no one will accept you if they know that about you!"
"You are nothing special, no one cares about you. You are selfish and don't have any qualities that someone would want as a friend. They only talk to you to be nice, it's the Christian thing to do. They really pity you."
These are some chains I have been bound with. The names of these chains are shame, fear and unworthiness.
There is a very good reason Satan ties so many of us with those particular chains. When Christians share their struggles, when we put down the fear and talk about that thing we thought was just too dirty, we find we are not alone. When we open it up it allows God to pour out healing on it, and in turn becomes the key that helps unshackle other prisoners.
The devil has slowly convinced us of his lies. We've been so desensitized that we don't see them. We blindly accept our bondage as the norm, it's what is expected.
Stand up! Ask God to reveal the chains restricting you! Do not allow yourself to be convinced that you need them! Get in your Bible and ask God to show you the armor he has placed there for us! To combat the lies the devil ties us with we need the word of God.
It is scary to let go! For me, I know I found a chain I need to cut when I feel fear or when I feel myself justifying it angrily.
Where is our freedom in Christ? We've already been freed! Why would we walk right back into our prisons?
Don't allow yourself to be convinced that your staying in the presidential suite at the Hilton when you are living in a crack house on the wrong side of town.